The Convert

I met an acquaintance the other day. I met him a lot of times but we only get to hold a proper conversation only recently. Though it was a short conversation, the content of it left me with sadness at the same time I am filled with inspiration of his strong determination.

So this guy, he is a Muslim convert (it has been a year I think, Alhamdulillah) and he is formerly from my school. I met him through camps, night cycling organised by the youth of the mosque.

There was this camp particularly that I remembered him giving a talk. He narrated about how his family poorly reacts to his updated faith and that he got shun by them. How heartbroken he was when he cannot perform his prayers openly in the house. It’s sorrowful when the two people whom he love dearly treated him negatively. What struck my heart most during that talk was that he mentioned Allah swt says that no matter how bad are you, if you are a Muslim you still get to go to the paradise. No matter how evil you are! But my parents, they aren’t Muslims. So no matter how good or angelic they are to the people around them, there aren’t able to get to Jannah! DO you know how dejected I feel? You guys can reunite with your family in Jannah! But what about mine? My mom, who has been struggling carrying me for 9 months, care for me when I’m sick… she can’t go to Jannah. My Dad, who has been taking care of the family, ensuring we have enough food on the table, protects the family.. what about him too? He can’t be able to be in Jannah… “

This is the same guy who get treated so poorly by his family and yet he still view them in such kindness! MASHA ALLAH! He still have thoughts for his family’s afterlife. I cried there and then. How could I not?

So when I met him again the other day I ask how he’s doing and how’s his family and stuff. Knowing his background, I don’t want him to talk about his sadness. Even if I ask him about his family, I am hopeful that somehow or rather he will jump in happiness and tell me that ” Masha Allah! I am so thankful to Allah that my parents finally have converted to the religion of truth” or somewhere around those line. But I can’t guarantee that he will say that so to be safe I ask a neutral question; “You are my senior from my school right. Which you do you graduate?” To which he replied “No, I didn’t graduate, I left school”  Totally didn’t expect him to say that. Of course internally I freak out because I have a strong notion (which I believe many of us share the same thought) that you cannot go far in life without an academic certification. In an exception of those minority who are able to succeed life in terms of wealth. You guys know who I am talking about (all those informational youtube videos watched have got to be paid off some day). Maybe because of my (strong) expression to his answer, he elaborated that it was because it’s a difficult time for him with his family and he was exploring Islam back then.

I was overwhelm with awe. He sacrificed his secular education for Islam. The rarity of people doing this is so rare that I can count it with single hand. One.  Subhanallah. It shows how determined he is to perfect his deen.

In front of me is man who had recently announce his faith in Islam and went to such extend for his love for Islam. And here I am who has been a Muslim for all my life and I am having difficulty to wake up for Fajr…. Astaghfirullah 😦 I felt so ashamed of myself. Why can’t I be like him? I have the best of situation and yet I couldn’t discipline myself for Him! But my acquaintance… he strive to perfect his deen no matter how difficult his situation is.

My tongue felt stiff when I try to process all the things that has been said. It makes the situation a bit awkward because I have no reply to that.

Dear Lord, The Lord of the Universe, The Most Forgiving, The All Knowing, grant me forgiveness for when I am careless with my words and distracted with Dunya. Grant the ummah forgiveness for whatever sins they fall into. Strengthen our hearts, strengthen our  faith & Imaan. Strengthen our will to prostrate before you and not fall easily to shaitan’s trap.

Dear Lord of the Worlds, The Protector, protect those who are in hardships. Grant them patience and bestow upon them your Hidayah and direct them to the path of truth.

Amiin! Amiin! Amiin!

I hope to see him again and hope that I can offer him my help in anyway that I could. In shaa Allah!

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Gerek Day!

It has been an exhausting week; report submission, UTs, completing team assignments, dealing with faulty software and studying antibiotics for gdp.
To say that I am ‘tired beyond words’ is a bit of an exaggeration ‘cos nothing can be compared to the work load that mom is dealing. So…  I’m just gonna go with very tired. Heh!

Naj has been an excellent help when my computer’s down. I am definitely contented to befriend her! Though she can be annoyingly funny at times, her stable state of mind is of a delight company. If I pass my Lab Management UT with colours with wings, large portion of it is due to her kindness for helping me out with my study. She makes sure she send sufficient stuffs to me via email the day before so that I have enough materials to study. I am grateful and pleased to have her as my friend! Indeed she’s been brought up in a good family :))

Naj! If you are reading this,  I really do appreciate it very much!! ❤ i buy you 3 packets of Gummy Bears if I get A for UT okay:)

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Study Partner !

 

Of a total opposite of a helpful friend, Aqeem is soo being a total ass for distracting me from study by throwing blue tack onto my laptop.  After attended the discussion forum, we ( me, Naj, Lili, Khalis & Aqeem) decided to have lunch and continue studying for our lab management UT afterwards. We spend our lunch reminiscing of the past; Sri Lanka trip. Definitely a lunch to remember!  Then, during study time, Lili and Aqeem sat together behind Najwa and I. Khalis was infront of us. What i thought would be a productive and effective time for study with them…wasn’t much of a productive time spent on studying.  Aqeem stealthily threw blue tack onto my laptop screen. I don’t notice until the blue tack builds up on my screen or when either Lili or Aqeem gave a casual remark like ” Fit, cantik laptop” -_-

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LOOK CLOSER!!

 

HAHHAHA! Najwa pun tak terlepas dari kene serang.  I think we made a nuisance of ourselves because as crowded as the library can go, the tables and chairs near us were empty. People decided not to be near the crazy students. “Siao ting tong”

Then, Aqeem took out this clever tool which can attach two different kinds of surface together..(like attach hp to the inner walls of the car or something)  ( I don’t know the right term for it) and throw and huge freaking thing onto my laptop when I got my back turn from him. It sticks on my screen! I got shocked la because it has a shattering sound to it.. Laptop’s fine… I was not. Naj and the couple covered their mouths  from laughing too loudly because apparently ” my expression was priceless”

Idiot.

Najwa took that black thing and experiment it on different kinds of surfaces. And guess what people?  She decided to try to stick it on my glasses. So, she threw that black thing on my face and due to the short distance and her excellent aim, it. freaking. sticks. on. my. spectacles.

Idiot. The ‘performance’ received a roaring laughter from everyone…even khalis…. I looked stupid sia.

She begged me to throw it one my face another time and aqeem continue to mercilessly attacked us with his blue tack. Never felt so bullied before in my entire life. Hmmphff….

Hahahhahahah!! Why do i have such weird crazy gerek friends??? So yeah. Crazy afternoon!

On a serious note, I need to get back to studying antibiotics for tmr’s gdp.

All in all, in the midst of a stressful week I thank YA Rabb for surround me with such funny and good friends!  Alhamdulillah!!!

Back to books!!

STOKED

November has been really really kind. I owe my thanks and appreciation to myself for controlling what goes in and out of my mind. Positive thoughts 🙂 I am getting the hold of controlling my overexcitement state. Not sure if you guys know what it means. Uumm..To put simply, it means I am emotionally reactive and my reaction to particular things may seem exaggerated but no… the feeling’s real and it can  get a lil bit overwhelming and may induce panics. But lately, thank God, I am able to contain it. I have to anyway.

Though November has been good on me, large portion of it consist of me ignoring a lot of the problems until it goes away OR I procrastinate until the eleventh hour. The latter refers to me chiong-ing my handwritten GDP RJ. That crazy crazy crazy Sunday. I shut everyone out from my life for those intense 6+ hours so I can dedicate my 100% attention to my 3-months assignment (which, thank GOD, I completed in 6+ hours). WORTH EVERY SINGLE SECONDS OF THAT!  BECAUSE I GOT 74% ON THAT PAPER!!!!!!! YAY!!!!

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I am currently waiting for my online result for the rest of the assignment. I don’t have high hopes for that because the quality of my online assignment is comparable to a turd. Sorry Faci… But Fingers CROSS!!

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Another nice surprise that took me off guard (I mean there are certain kind of surprises that you kinda expect to get it. But this is the opposite. Like really!) is that I won an award for GDP module! Like who would expect that? I honestly can think of 20 other classmates who deserve to be the recipient of that award. Because they always have their notes prepared before class and got everything figured out while here I am asking people about the basic stuff.

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JC mentioned “she knows her drugs well and always continues to improve herself. It is evident. I can see that. She is also very calm during picking and packing”

I don’t know what people see in me during that peak time of the class (where everyone is so busy running around to dispense the drugs) but to tell you honestly, my heart beats against my ribs for 200 bpm, if I may exaggerate. Maybe I don’t show how panicky I get but my palms are always clammy. Also maybe I don’t show it because I don’t want to raise the intensity of the situation in my team. Team 1 has been known to be the cursed team. That alone is handful. Panicking about it doesn’t help to handle the situation. Being in the ‘cursed’  team has taught me a lot. That story will be told another day…hahah.. but really! You got my words for it.

We are our own worst critics so they say. I humbly accept the reward if it meant for me. Maybe I have to work hard to prove to myself that I actually deserve it because ultimately we are our own competitor.

FYP in November has not been any different from the rest of past months. But I guess we are coping better with FYP. Rolling eyes to problems at hand and injecting humor into it are one of the ways to manage the demands of FYP. Ultimately sharing thoughts and brainstorming for ideas are one of my favorite ways to handle it. Note that I don’t use “ bitching about the problem”. Because we are civilized like that. One of my favorite moments with the girls is when after our prayer session on the laboratory level of W5 building. Tasha was unwrapping her package (of her online shopping apparels). We made silly comments on each other. Basically enjoyed the time together. Best part is that I got everything on tape. Hahhahah!

 

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Before I forget, I want to share one of the most memorable things that happened during our GDP lesson. As you can see from the pictures below, we are loitering outside our classroom because apparently we are locked outside. Which is a good thing thatwe are not locked inside because its a 2+ hours of waiting to get the door fixed. Yeap guys. An out of the class experience.

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The boys in our class are all pumped up to force the door open. By force I mean they are going to smash it. No. I was just kidding.

 

 

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It may look like we are enjoying and wasting our time away but NO. Class is still ongoing. Grab whatever resources (mainly phones because papers and pens are scarce outside the classroom) for notes.

 

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Our Facilitator may look calm and controlled. But I am sure he is worried as hell that we are all stuck outside for 2hrs +.

 

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Pharmacy Technician.

 

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Pharmacy Technician in action

 

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Girls too are strong. So we want to contribute our intelligence and skill. But to no avail.

 

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“Hais, lagi pintu tak bukak, lagi lama la kita kene hold back. STRESSSS!”

 

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The doors are opened, lesson carries on as per normal. Haish..Tough life.

 

 

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Pharmacy Technician in Action

 

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I could never imagine being this lucky in a period of a month. However happy I may feel, I can’t help but to be cautious for the thing that may come in my way next because … I don’t know.. bad gut feeling…

May Allah protect us all!

AMIN!!

Lazy days

 

I woke up to the rhythm of the pouring rain and it makes me want to snuggle in bed much much longer than I plan to. Thinking about the amount of works waiting for me, I lost the mood to be lazy.

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It feels like it was decades ago since I have a written assignment. But oh well, It feels amazing to write. I miss writing in general whether or not it’s on school assignments, poems, life events, I miss the feeling of feeling something ooze out my head and makes my shoulder lighter and my head clearer. I’m going to resume writing….maybe. 🙂

Have y’all play the game Quizup? If you haven’t do check it out. I have been playing it quite recently and I find its educational because it test you on subjects that you think you know it all. Its great exercise for the brain. Gets you thinking and stuff. Did I mention that it can get sassy on you? Hahaha… it has become my favorite app to play. XD

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For all the motivation that has been fading out from me, I hope to that I am strong enough to hold on to the remaining motivations and soldier on through the obstacles that may come in my way. In sha Allah.